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By Sara Mosleh Moreno
However, on other occasions what happens is that the wound worsens, the pain becomes entrenched and resentment appears towards the person who caused it.
Although this feeling, like almost all negative emotions, is a protective mechanism that is born after pain so that it does not fall into oblivion, resentment can become our worst enemy and transform us into frustrated and obsessive people, loaded with emotions negatives that make us physically and mentally ill. "Having a grudge is like taking poison hoping that the other person dies," says Víctor Salamanca, a psychologist with the DesQbre cabinet.
Forgiveness is not easy at all, much less when our ego and pride are allied so that we consider it an undeserved gift that we give to those who have wronged us. However, it is not the recipient of the forgiveness, but the person who grants it, who gains the most from it. Forgiving is an act of empowerment with which we free ourselves from a harmful emotional charge that affects our relationships and prevents us from moving forward.
Dissolving resentment requires heartfelt, sincere and authentic forgiveness. This does not mean that painful memories should be forgotten or denied the right to do justice to the person who has been injured. We may forgive someone but feel the need to protect future victims or exclude the perpetrator from our lives or from society. And it does not mean having to understand the other; Although it is easier to overcome resentment if the reasons that have led the other person to hurt are known, many times there is no logical explanation, and the only thing we achieve if we follow that path is to enter a labyrinth with a difficult exit.
Forgiveness is giving up those feelings of anger, resentment, and pain; to turn the page and forget about revenge; to free ourselves from accumulated resentment and to let our wounds heal. Not surprisingly, the Greek root for "forgiveness" means "to change and alter." Hence, forgiveness is an opportunity to clean up our present, close the doors to the past and build a good future.